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notMENSA society for the stupid |
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Fabulously funny fantasy novel .
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Historic Jobs - Worst Jobs for Women :: Number 1 - Flatulence Analyst |
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Ideal for: Graduate students desperate for a good
idea for a thesis.
Job Specifications: Why look for a cure for cancer
when you can devote your research efforts to studying…flatulence? Join the
team of Minneapolis gastroenterologist Michael Levitt, who is looking for
assistants that will inhale the, er, “gases” emitted by subjects who have
consumed nearly half their weight in pinto beans. The goal of this rigorous
experiment? To find out if fart can be an accurate symptom of intestinal
health. What, ultrasounds not good enough anymore?
Drawbacks: Any job that involves placing your face
near someone’s butt and telling them to fart on you will never be worth the
money you’re paid for it.
Perks: You work with a brilliant (if slightly
bonkers) scientist who will give you credit in assisting him in this largely
neglected field of medicine. (Of course, it’s easy to understand why it’s
been neglected, but as a struggling graduate student you can’t afford to be
picky.) Costs of the experiment are relatively low, especially if you clip
enough supermarket coupons, though it is rather difficult to find a
corporate sponsor. |
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