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Ideal for: anyone who’s ever been pecked by a
chicken
Job Specifications: You hack open a chicken, pull out the entrails, clean
out the offal. The process takes about five minutes, if you’re good. Which
leaves you 9 hours and 55 minutes more to do the same thing, over and over
again.
Drawbacks: It’s dreary, disgusting and mind numbingly repetitive work, but
don’t worry—there’s very little risk that you’ll fall asleep at your desk.
For one thing, the thought of burrowing your face onto the steel counters,
amidst tiny bits of chicken gizzards, is enough to make you reach for that
cup of coffee. Besides, you can always take three deep breaths. The sharp
smell of rotting innards works better than smelling salts.
Perks: A discount on chicken parts—not that you’d ever want to see another
chicken again, or eat any form of animal meat for that matter. Don’t worry,
with the pay you get, you might as well live off vegetables.
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