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Ideal for: Florence Nightingale impersonators
Job specifications: Hospitals are supposed to be clean, sanitized
environments, so sterilized that you can practically eat off the floor.
Until they open the garbage cans. Inside those bags are hypodermic needles,
brain matter, blood, contaminated faeces, pus-soaked cotton balls, amputated
limbs, and a good deal of tissue and fat from the plastic surgery
department. Your job is to clean all that up, and put it away where nobody
can see them.
Drawbacks: Aside from the ickiness factor, you’re dealing with germs,
germs, germs. The reason people went to the hospital in the first place is
that they were sick, so you run the risk of being infected with anything
from AIDS to Ebola. And while most clean up crews can more or less assume
that the yellow mush is left over mashed potatoes, what you’re actually
looking at it s a blob of lipids from a liposuction.
Perks: if ever you get waves of nausea, you’re just two minutes away from
the emergency room.
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