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Ideal for: men of the cloth looking for something exciting to do on a
Saturday night.
Job Specifications: The Ghostbusters having long retired, it is your job
to face the Demons, angry spirits, and numerous denizens of the Underworld
and convince them that to leave the poor humans alone. Tools of the trade
include Holy Water and a Rosary, as well as a few handy Latin phrases, and
the Pope’s assurance that God’s got your back covered.
Drawbacks: Be prepared for an ugly fight. Demons are powerful, and
notoriously temperamental, and the Holy Water won’t do anything to improve
your mood. The things you see will haunt you for the rest of your life,
making you skittish and possibly insane, ruining all your chances of getting
a cushy and relatively stress-free job translating ancient Hebrew texts at
the Vatican.
Perks: If you ever decide to leave the Church, you can always pursue a
career in Hollywood, advising horror film directors and making guest
appearances on the Jay Leno show.
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