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Ideal for: anyone considering having a family
(best contraceptive ever)
Job Specifications: Many parents complain about the challenges of raising
a toddler. Try taking care of thirty at a time. Their happy mothers drop the
little devils on your lap before you go to work, leaving you with the
problem of how to entertain them for at least eight hours. They will eat the
crayons, pull each other’s hair, throw paint on the walls, and then ask you
tell them the story of The Three Little Pigs about 20 times in a row.
Drawbacks: None of these kids are toilet trained. You have to change their
diapers, or if they’re just learning how to use the potty, to clean up after
any “accidents”. Once in a while you may find one curious youngster
experimenting on whether or not dirty diapers can be smeared against the
walls to make any pretty paintings. You will also have to deal wit temper
tantrums, about an average of 5 an hour, bearing in mind that children are a
lot like howling dogs: one starts, and everyone follows.
Perks: You get lots of hugs and kisses, and come Christmas time, get a
mother-load of gifts from grateful parents.
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